HOW TO FORGIVE YOURSELF

Unless otherwise stated, all scripture quotations are taken from the New American Standard Bible® (NASB), Copyright © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation.

Used by permission. www.Lockman.org

1 Kings 8:46 says “there is no man who does not sin.” The apostle also says in 1 John 1:8, “If we say that we have no sin, we are deceiving ourselves and the truth is not in us.” Because there is sin in everyone, believers inclusive, there is a possibility of falling and committing some sin. Due to this contingency, Jesus Christ became not only our Saviour but also our Advocate. 1 John 2:1 says; 

“My little children, I am writing these things to you so that you may not sin. And if anyone sins, we have an Advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous.”

Jesus Christ stands before the Father for us, to appease Him. When the Father is therefore appeased, we can now receive forgiveness.

However, Jesus Christ will not be able to do His work of advocacy if you do not confess your sin. By confessing your sin, you are acknowledging you have sinned, and believing God for forgiveness. 1 John 1:9 says;

“If we confess our sins, He (God) is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”

So, when a sinner confesses his sin, the sinner receives forgiveness.

But how can God be both faithful and righteous in justifying a sinner when the law says, “The person who sins will die?” (Ezekiel 18:20). Will He not be breaking the law and thus become unrighteous? “Shall not the Judge of all the earth deal justly?” (Genesis 18:25). Far be it from God to act unjustly. He will rather declare His righteousness in making true judgments. It is in declaring His righteousness that He manifests His glory to all the peoples and show Himself to all as the Judge. (Psalms 97:6; 50:6).

He must therefore righteously execute His judgment on the sinner to reveal Himself as the true Judge and also to reveal His glory to the world.

It should be known that God will not just pass over your sins because you confess them. For that will make Him an unrighteous Judge. But for Him to be able to justify you and pass over your sin and still remain just, He must provide a ransom on which He will execute your judgment. Romans 3:25-26 therefore says, 

“Whom (Jesus) God displayed publicly as a propitiation in His blood through faith. This was to demonstrate His righteousness, because in the forbearance of God He passed over the sins previously committed; for the demonstration, I say, of His righteousness at the present time, so that He would be just and the justifier of the one who has faith in Jesus.”

God has set forth Jesus Christ as a Ransom for everyone. Whoever believes in Him can now be forgiven and justified. Jesus Christ therefore is not only our Saviour and Advocate but also the Propitiation for our sins. He takes the place of the sinner who confesses his sin and believes in Him as his Substitute and Ransom. Upon Jesus Christ then does God execute the sinner’s judgment while He justifies the sinner. And this God did to demonstrate and show how righteous He is in His judgments.

So, the forgiveness received by the sinner is a result of the demonstration and declaration of God’s righteousness. And Paul, talking about the gospel that says Jesus has become our Propitiation, says in Romans 1:17 “For in it (that is, the gospel) the righteousness of God is revealed.” 

Believing in Jesus, the Propitiation God has set forth, also declares His righteousness for Him to be known as the Judge and to display His glory. 

Now, there are some who find it difficult to forgive themselves. They suppose that if they sin, there is no remedy. In despair, they condemn themselves forever. They are always sorrowful. It is good to be sorrowful and remorseful when one discovers his sin, but such sorrow should lead to repentance and not a state to indwell forever. 2 Corinthians 7:10 says;

“For godly sorrow worketh repentance to salvation not to be repented of: but the sorrow of the world worketh death.” (KJV).  

Any regret that does not produce repentance that will lead to salvation is demonic. Although God wants you to be sorrowful for your sins, He does not want you to remain in sorrow forever. 

Ordinarily, if you sin, you cannot forgive yourself. So do not first of all try to forgive yourself. This is because if you sin, you do not primarily sin against yourself but against God. You transgress His commandments. You cannot transgress the laws of God and then go ahead to forgive yourself. He is the Judge and the verdict must issue from Him. And according to the law, you must die. But having provided a Substitute for you, God who is the Judge, can now faithfully and righteously forgive you. Then, you can now apply the forgiveness He has shown you to forgive yourself. 

Therefore if you sin, acknowledge it and confess your sin to God, repent and plead the blood of Jesus to show you believe Him as your Substitute while asking God for forgiveness.  With the intercession of the Advocate, you will receive the forgiveness of God. This forgiveness of God you have received is the premise on which you can now forgive yourself. Since His forgiveness is a result of His righteous act, you will be cleansed from all unrighteousness and be justified when you apply His forgiveness on your heart. When you forgive yourself on this basis, you also affirm that God is the true Judge and that you have also seen His glory.

However, the devil may want to bring up some accusations to condemn you. Your conscience will then be protesting. The answer to this is still the blood of Jesus. The blood of Jesus is the same with Jesus. By pleading the blood you show the devil Jesus Christ has been sacrificed for you and he therefore has no ground to bring any accusation against you. As long as Jesus satisfies the Father by offering Himself on your behalf, you are justified. If the Judge has then justified you, the devil has lost all grounds. If God be for you, who can be against you? No longer can anyone bring a charge against you, not even yourself. (Romans 8:31,33). Also, when you plead the blood of Jesus, it will purge your conscience so as to be free from all guilt. (Hebrews 9:14).  So by pleading the blood of Jesus, you satisfy God and receive forgiveness, you silence and overcome the devil’s accusations and you also get rid of all guilt by having your conscience purged.